DiasporaJamaican News

The Sassy Guide to surviving weight gain

- by Nadia ‘Sassynadz’ Akram -

Back in March this year, The Mail Online published a graphic chart revealing ‘The Fattest Countries in the World’. This sparked an outrage in Trinidad and Tobago as according to the chart they were shockingly ranked the 3rd  fattest nation in the world, with their results for the average female BMI rocketing at a sky high 30.6  (generally speaking, a BMI over 25 is considered overweight). Jamaica fared only slightly better, with the average for a female being 29.8. It may also be surprising to learn that the UK, which has worryingly rising obesity levels, was 26th on The Mail’s list.

The backlash of anger from Trinidadians was immense, with much ridicule and disbelief. Whilst many strongly dispute that the chart’s findings are accurate, what was most interesting were the multitude of reasons (or excuses) given for the population’s weight gain.

Well, with summer finally here, and the new years resolutions to lose weight long gone out the window, many of us may well be feeling down at not having stuck to our diets, not having used that expensive gym membership, not being able to fit in to the glamorous swimsuit we bought months ago when we had good intentions and the pre-booked holiday was still far away…and so on. Never fear though! Suck that stomach in!

Here is our list of reasons we’ve compiled to perhaps explain those extra pounds:

  • “Watching every little thing I eat is too stressful, and stress makes me gain weight.”
  • “I figured since rice cakes don’t have many calories, the same was true of other cakes. Like fudge cake. And pancakes…with syrup…and cream.”
  • “I went to the gym and somebody was on my machine so I realised everything happens for a reason and it wasn’t meant to be.”
  • “The economy is in such rough shape, it’s hard to afford the new clothes I’ll have to buy as I get smaller so I’m just waiting until it gets better.”
  • “My hair has grown really fast lately which is why the scale is showing a higher number than usual.”
  • “I have a fruit and vegetable intolerance so I have to eat junk food for my own safety.”
  • “Weight gain? What weight gain? Are you sure you don’t need an eye test?”
  • “I was stung by a bee in all the right places!”

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